BY PSALMS OHWOJITE
Recently, the world celebrate father’s day, calling attention to the role a father plays in the upbringing of a child and in the family. There is no doubt that the involvement of a father contributes significantly to a child’s development.
Traditionally, fathers have been viewed as material providers and physical protectors of the family, while mothers have been regarded as more sensitive to the family’s emotional needs. Those roles may overlap—in some families, to a large degree. Nevertheless, researchers say that a father and a mother each contribute a unique ingredient to effective parenting.
While a child’s first impression of love comes from both parents, research shows that children who are close to their father do better at school, have fewer emotional problems, and are less likely to abuse drugs or get involved in delinquent behavior.
This is expecially true with the boy child who naturally take on the image of his father. It therefore behoves on fathers to get down to their children’s level, to play, to teach and not be irresponsible or to take themselves too seriously.
As children grows father’s should learn to take the time needed to cultivate a good relationship with them.
To illustrate the role of both parents expecially the father to the social and mental development of a child, family researcher Judith Wallerstein quoted in the awake magazine relates a personal experience when her twelve-year-old daughter was hit by a car. She related that her daughter wanted her father to ride in the ambulance because she had greater confidence in his ability to take charge. Later on in the hospital, she wanted her the mother to sit at her bedside all day to comfort her.
The point is that a father brings a measure of stability and protection to the family that a mother may struggle to provide on her own. At the same time, a mother creates a nurturing environment as she listens and care with empathy.
Father’s can build a better relationship with their daughters too and help them become responsible women in the society. A father ought to teach his daughter by words and actions how she deserves to be treated by men.
Father’s should realise that their daughters observe how they treat their mothers. When a father loves and respect his wife, his daughter sees the qualities that are important for her to look for in a spouse later in life.
It is important to note that persistent criticism to the girl child damages her self-worth and can cause her to look to other men for approval—men who do not have her best interests at heart.
All in all, being a good father isn’t about perfection — it’s about being physically and emotionally present, encouraging honest conversations without judgment, teaching patiently by words and example, and making consistent effort at showing love for your family.
NIM
